Author: Sagacity

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Death’s March

As is usually the case, death has come knocking again.  He makes his rounds constantly through the world.  Sometimes with almost greedy insistence on a few individuals and others he spares for what seems a lifetime more.  Interestingly, some view it as a favor and a blessing while others view it as horror and devastation.  He undoubtedly works in both ways as we see manifest all around us.
My paternal Grandmother’s brother, David William Donaldson, passed away on Sunday.  After what seems like a relatively short struggle with prostate cancer, he spent his last weeks in pain and hiding.  It doesn’t sound like too many visitors.  At least more angelic than earthly.  His funeral falls tomorrow and with his age nearing 78 it doesn’t ring in as a great surprise.  The longer one lives the more inevitable it comes that we will pass beyond the veil.  As my Uncle Larry Andra has told at every funeral I have heard him speak, it is like a great ship leaving harbour.  Those standing in the harbour sob and cry and the ships disappears and it is shouted, “there she goes”.  On the other hand, as the ship comes in the shout is raised, “there she comes” and all is merry and joyful.  We witness this in life and we witness the other side at death.  We celebrate the ship coming in at birth and mourn her leaving.  Really we only count ourselves blessed if we are not there for both of the same person.
Tonight was the funeral of another friend, Justin Levi Rose.  I don’t know his age, but he must have only been about 25.  I only met him two months ago when he come to visit the Family History Library where I work on Tuesday nights.  A recent convert, he was putting together his family history to go to the temple and do baptisms for the dead.  Over the course of several weeks we pieced together several significant portions of his family and he went to the temple with 50 or more family members to do their temple work.  I found out tonight he sailed away last Tuesday of his own accord.
Therein is another interesting part of death.  Some we see it coming and almost expect it.  Others it seems to take completely by surprise.  Yet to those to whom it comes, it seems to sometimes be the opposite.   Uncle Dave just had a new knee and when I visited with him in April seemed like he had a new lease on life.  I don’t think he anticipated death anytime soon just 6 months ago.  Yet I find out that Justin has been living in a state of which they call bi-polar in which he has struggled with wanting death for some time.  Yet in my eyes, I would never have thought either of them were near and certainly not Justin.
One never knows.  In the deepest chambers of the soul we only can understand our path, our destiny, our lives, and our deaths.  Some seem to understand themselves, others ignore.  Others misinterpret, and others walk a path of full knowledge all their days.  Most interestingly, it seems no mortal really knows what battles are being fought in our lives.  Whether they be in the mind or the body they are being fought.  Some lose now, some lose later.  All will die.
The only ray of hope in all this is that we are only in a temporary state.  Death for all is only temporary.  More importantly, the struggles in our souls are also only temporary.  The day will come when all will know as they are known and see as they are seen.  Then will we all rejoice in this great probationary game.  There will of course be some sorrow, but the overwhelming feeling will be one of joy and praise.
Until then, the ships keep coming and going and we watch with sadness and delight.
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More of the same; Life

Time keeps ticking by too quickly sometimes.  I have so much to write but not as much time as I would like to do it in.  Such is the limitations in the probationary game.  There are plenty of achievements to report though in the past week or two.
This evening I spoke with Gerald Neuffer in Columbia, Missouri.  In a most random turn of events, I noticed that a Jenna Neuffer became friends with my friend, Kami Lowe on Facebook.  With a name as rare as Neuffer, I knew all odds were in my favor of having a near shared ancestry.  I sent Miss Neuffer a message and asked for her Grandfather’s name and phone number.  Which she supplied.  Come to find out, I even had Gerald already in my family history.  I just had his first name Myron (Gerald is his middle name but he goes by it.  Probably due to remove confusion with his father’s name being Myron).  He knew the Andra’s well and said he remembered Millie, who was just younger than him.  Funny how small a world it is.  He went to get his PhD and never left Columbia after moving there in 1947.  We conversed for a little while he dug for information verifying I was not this total stranger calling for his family history for some other sinister reason.  He sounds like a good guy.  He asked if I was doing genealogy.  I confirmed I was and that I was the family historian.  He then happily related he was basically that for the Neuffer/Nuffer family.  I was definitely glad to hear that.  What is the chances of the Andra historian running into the Nuffer historian in Columbia Missouri?  Very far removed from Preston, Idaho!
I received a phone call from Jacqui yesterday about the Phibbs/Ross/Beachell family.  I tried returning her call and spoke with her mother for a few minutes.  I am glad she finally returned my message.  I only left it in May!  That was before we moved!
In other news, there was an e-mail that found its way to me from Robert in Fresno, California.  A most interesting question.  He asked if I knew of any of the siblings of my Constance Jorgensen.  I always felt Constance most likely had siblings but was never able to find any.  Between her parents marriage and Constance’s birth, there is twelve years.  I was sure there were other siblings.  Olavus and Hanna Mathea Jorgensen immigrated with Constance and settled in Richmond, Utah.  Constance married Ole Christiansen and gave birth to my Great Great Grandmother Martha Christiansen who is the mother of my Lillian Coley.  Constance died in Portland, Oregon while visiting and was buried there.  In the whole episode, I knew some day I would have to do some research in Norway to find the rest of this family.  Well, Robert e-mailed me asking me if his grandmother, Amanda Jorgensen Swensen could be a child of Olavus and Hanna.  He produced a copy of a hand written copy pedigree she had produced in 1935.  Sure enough, everything lined up.  Well, Amanda was born another 12 years after my Constance (24 after the marriage of the parents).  She immigrated to Utah a good 10 years after her parents and sibling came over and settled in Logan, Utah.  By the time she arrived her parents were both deceased and her sister had married.  It seems that she never knew she was only 15 miles from her parent’s graves and her sister.  The exciting news is that Amanda gave us the names of her siblings, none of which made it to America to her knowledge.  We added the 5 siblings.  Don’t know their ages, but definitely gives some more to go from.  That will give us much more to go from when the time for the Norway research begins.
I am happy to report I completed the New Testament this evening.  I am one day late.  If I had read the one chapter a day, I would have finished yesterday.  Last weekend put me just off enough that I did not catch up in time.  I completed the Book of Mormon on schedule this year on August 27th.  Now I can go through some General Conference talks and some other reading for the year.  Next year is the Doctrine and Covenants which you can almost read three times in a year.  I think I will just do it twice though.
The ward continues to blossom when it comes to family history.  It seems like people are doing their homework, research, and compiling regularly.  I have e-mails at least once or twice a week for help on something.  That is an indication something is going on.  That is definitely something which is a good thing.
Online the family history work continues to reveal new and interesting things.  I received an e-mail from a Homer Mason.  He was inquiring concerning the Jonas family in Washington State.  Come to find out, Anna Jonas is his Grandmother.  Anna was the daughter of William Jonas who was the brother to my Joseph Jonas; father to my great grandfather Joseph Nelson Jonas.  He knows very little so it has been fun introducing him to the family.  I have especially enjoyed his research on a line of the family I have not been able to crack.  It has proved not to be an easy line for him, but with his living in Yakima, he is much closer and capable of doing the work than I can.  I really hope I am accepted to the University of Idaho for Law School.  Then I could work on the Jonas, Ross, and Sharp lines in Washington State.
Stepping back to the Andra family.  This past weekend Amanda and I took a trip to Washington DC for our monthly temple visit.  But a new aspect as emerged.  My Great Uncle and Aunt, Donald and Lolane Andra, are now serving a mission in the temple.  We went up Friday night and stayed with Amanda’s Uncle and Aunt in Springfield.  Saturday we picked up Don and Lolane and made our way to Mt. Vernon.  They thoroughly enjoyed themselves.  It was the 18th Century Fair so there were masses of people.  Don and Lolane are good and quick on their feet.  Despite being in their 60’s they move well.  Don reminds me so much of my Great Grandpa.  I get a kick out of both of them.  We were limited on time as they had to be to the temple to work later in the afternoon.  We did probably the fastest walking tour of Mt. Vernon I can imagine.  We zoomed all over the grounds, through the fair, and then back up to their apartment to change and attend the temple.
On a side note, as I went into the endowment room, I noticed the officiator’s name was John Whatcott.  I looked at him and asked if he was from Kanosh.  He looked a bit surprised at me and said he grew up there.  I told him of the Whatcott’s I knew.  After the session he asked me to remain in the celestial room so we could visit.  We had a great visit.  Come to find out he knows Don and Lolane from St. George.  Small world.  Don knew which session we were on and waited for us to leave the celestial room.  He walked us down to the next floor and we parted again.  I met Don’s Home Teaching companion, Elder Toronto, while picking up Amanda’s Aunt’s glasses from the temple lost and found.  Funny how interlinked the world is, at least in the church.
I have not made mention of it yet, but I am going from contractor status to full associate status at Bank of America.  Meaning, I will be an employee of Bank of America and not an at will person filling a seat.  Many companies now do the contractor business as they can then hire on employees after they have shown their worth.  I must have done well enough for them to offer me employment starting October 1.  I am excited.  Business has been picking up.  I don’t know if it is from the crunch in the market or what.  Bank of America definitely stands on higher ground than those feeling the squeeze or sinking under the housing market.  One thing is for sure, with this rate cut, we are expecting the next month to be hectic.
My birthday came and went just like every other day or the year.  I am back to being congratulated for it being my unbirthday.  I received all sorts of e-mails (which will take me a good week to respond to them all), many messages on Facebook, and a couple of cards and gifts.  Amanda and I enjoyed a nice big meal at Chili’s for dinner.  We joked about it being our triannual beef night.  It is birthdays or anniversary that I get to eat a steak.  Monday was a 12 oz Ribeye.  Mmmm, so good.  That is of course not mentioning the Idaho potatos.  Amanda got me a shirt, a jump drive, and something else which slips me at the moment.  I also received a journal, a few checks, and some other random memorabilia.  I honestly don’t feel any different now than I think I did when I was 19.  Except the fact my knee was reconstructed in 2004 and doesn’t give me the issues it did at 19.  So I guess I feel better than at 19.  I have filled out in stature, even added a little padding in the middle,  and perhaps a little wiser.  Life is good.
My blessings continue to flow despite my inept nature.  I continue to be given the little peaceable things of the kingdom from time to time.  They make the living and endurance all worth it.  Line upon line right?  Sometimes I wish it was more page upon page, but alas, I am not the one running the show.  Church goes well.  I feel spiritually well.  Not the muscular behemoth I would like to be spiritually, but I feel strong enough to do what needs to be done and any forseeable adventure.
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Idaho’s Craig

It seems I keep getting this bombardment of what I think about Senator Craig.  Well, here we go.
I have no quarrels with the man.  He wasn’t always the nicest man in the hallway when passing.  Then again, I don’t think I have met a Senator yet who really went out of their way to say hello.  That is the extent of my personal experience with him.  I think I said hello twice passing in the underground tunnels between the Dirksen and Russell Buildings.
Beyond that, here is my take on the scenario.  Idaho seems to like him and have always done so.  He met their needs and I think he enjoyed his role as Senator.
However, the little ordeal in Minneapolis is something that was quite foolish.  Having been in stupid positions before, I know all the little ways you try and weasel out of it.  Which it surely sounds like he did.  I am not so much concerned what happened in that stall, whether he was soliciting or not, but he played the weasel in trying to get out of it.  For the most part, he was successful.  They only charged him for disorderly conduct.  It would be hard to catch him on more unless he allowed the police officer to actually climb in his stall or he climbed in the other one.  Then I would say we have serious grounds for what his intentions were.  Picking up toilet paper, a piece of paper, with whatever hand, or just waving a nice hello to the person in the stall next to him doesn’t really matter.  To me they don’t prove anything lewd or a great breaking of the law.  Now if there was a mirror in his hand, there are some issues…
It does bother me that police don’t have something better to do than sit in a bathroom stall to find those who want to enjoy some time with another man.  On the other hand, I am disappointed that people actually do this enough that it is a public disturbance that the police have to be called in to do this.  At any rate, it is a bad note of commentary of the society that use the restrooms at Minneapolis.  I expect this is a wider problem than just the cold and snow of Minnesota.
Alright, the Senator got caught with his hand in another stall.  For what reason, I don’t think I or Idahoans generally care.  The lying or trying to back peddle out of it, that seems just human nature to a large degree.  I can even see pleading guilty to the charge to just be done with it.  How many of us could really fight that speeding ticket they say we were going 11 over when we are pretty sure it wasn’t more than 8?  But we pay it just to be over and done with it.  That seems like what has happened here.  Okay, I am fine with that.
I am somewhat concerned that a US Senator would be allegedly caught doing something like that.  I think his electorate might even think twice before reelecting him.  But what concerns me is that a Senator seems to be so thoughtless in his actions.  For his being not very nice in the hallway of the Russell Building, he sure seemed pretty nice to say hi to the person in the stall next to him.  That was not thinking.  Next, he should have made it public knowledge and just been done with it.  It is a petty situation but not reporting it to those who care about it made it stink.
But the thing that alarms me is that he isn’t willing to fight.  For a man who sits in Senator William Edgar Borah’s seat and perhaps even behind his very desk, he seems shameful.  The Lion of Idaho would be ashamed a man would falter and not raise his mighty fist to the party.  What comes first?  Idaho or Republicans?  Senator Borah was known for standing for principle, for his state, and not ever being dictated to by the party.  This man seems to be weak and willing to forfeit what he was elected to in Idaho for what the party thinks elsewhere.  I still don’t hear many people calling for his resignation in Idaho.  It is elsewhere, some of his own selfish companions in the Senate.  What happened to principle?  What happened to standing up for something?  What happened to honor and integrity.  Well, we don’t really know what happened in that stall.  Whatever it was, I hope his honour and integrity is still intact.  But sadly, it doesn’t appear to be.
A straight man doing actions confused with being gay?  A Senator claimed to be doing something in a bathroom stall?  A State Representative faltering to a Party?  If he is a good man, he will stand up and serve the remainder of his term, regardless of who calls for his resignation.  He has nothing against him which disqualifies him from finishing his term.  A Misdemeanor does not remove a Senator from office.  Even an Ethics Committee wouldn’t remove him for that.  If he serves Idaho, he will remain.  If he serves the party, he will leave.  If such is the case, good riddance.  Let’s find us another man to honorably fill Senator Borah’s shoes.
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The World of Adoption

Let me tell you, the process of selecting individuals to adopt a baby is hard work.  I can imagine what it must be like to some degree to be hunting for a spouse online.  I really prefer doing things in person.  Since the person with the baby doesn’t have access to the internet at home, I offered to help do the search.  I have reached out to friends, family, and the LDS Social Services website to find those who might provide a good home.
On the good side, the response has been wonderful.  I am learning a whole lot about an area I really did not know existed.  What is more, it is much more extensive, organized, and larger than I would have ever thought.  Many have responded and contacted me and many have been culled from the crowd by LDS Social Services’ rules and restrictions.  On a good note, I did find a cousin of mine who announced to his family they were going to adopt and his sister just happened to know I was looking for someone.  We made the connection and are working to see if we can follow that end through.
Just as with missionary work, you don’t focus all your attention on just one or two when they might fall through.  I spent probably a good six hours on the LDS website working through all the biographies on there.  I think I reviewed every single one of them to one degree or another and have a list of about 30 couples that caught my eye and felt good.  I have shared that list with the birth mother but plan on narrowing the list down to about 15.  I just have to spend a few more hours in order to work through their profiles more closely.  I am quite impressed with the variety of individuals though that are in those 30.  I was afraid when I started I would only choose photogenic couples or younger ones.  But such has not been the case.  I think they extend to all ages, all sizes, educational backgrounds, ect.  They are all over the country as well.  I know there are another couple or two who are going through what they need to for them to be considered an option.
On the whole, this whole scenario has raised the profile of adoption.  As I have visited with people it is funny how many people will not be available for this baby but are seriously registering so they can adopt in the future.  So what might be a sticky situation for the birthmother here is in my view working some great things.
I will tell you, I continue to have some sleeplessness at night in concern for this child who isn’t even mine.  But as I help work through and select parents to raise this child, I feel a certain affinity for him.  What is even more interesting, I think of all the children who have been adopted before.  How much time, effort, and money that has gone into each one.
There is so much planning and consideration that goes into place for any child to be born.  But it is a whole new array of choices and decisions to make for an adoption, at least where we get to play a part in it.  Even then, social workers and many people still work to make the adoption work.  If it doesn’t benefit anything else, I know it has benefitted me.  I have had to weigh all the options in the possilibity of us taking this baby.  Then when we just couldn’t make that work, trying to work out for others to have the opportunity, help them to plan, and keep the birthmother’s plate as little as possible has been a chore.  It has had its rewards though.
It truly takes a community even to bring a baby into this world.  At least to do it well.  It only expands from there.  It is amazing the world we live in!
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Crowns, Adoption, and Lewdness

The final episode of the tooth isn’t quite as interesting a tale as were the previous two.  Therefore, I will have to cap it off, literally, with just saying it went smoothly and I was out within an hour.  In my remaining space, here are a few updates on life.
Amanda and I have been approached to consider adopting a child that is coming available in December.  Due to the circumstances we have tried to exhaust our mental processes for the positive and negatives sides of this situation.  For the most part we have determined we simply cannot do this right now.  It either means and end to Amanda’s schooling or costs in daycare that would put us far beyond our income.  Therefore, if you know of a good couple who are looking for a child to adopt, please let me know.
I am watching with shock at the latest releases regarding Idaho’s Senator Larry Craig.  I am ashamed a public servant could be so utterly selfish as to bring such disregard upon those he represents.  Whether he is guilty of the crime or not, the ineptitude is such to warrant his resignation or removal from office.  A writer of our laws cannot make a coherent decision of whether to plead guilty or not?  What is more, when his moral character is at stake he was willing to take a guilty plea to make it go away.  Sounds like too little integrity to me.  It seems that if a persons character is at stake, they should be willing to give all to defend in honesty that good name.  That should ring all the more true when the person’s character represents nearly 1.5 million people!  While Senator Craig has done much good, sadly such a blemish can undermine all he has done and render him useless in the future.  It is time to switch employment if he thinks these actions in a restroom are befitting of a representative of the State of Idaho and the United States of America.
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Hands off Higher Ed

Wall Street Journal

12 May 2007

Hillsdale, Mich. – From the first days of federal aid to higher education, instinct told us such aid would carry with it obligations that, in the words of Bill Buckley, “a free university ought not to undertake.”  Over the past 50 years a few private colleges and universities across America, including Hillsdale College, where I am president, have paid the price to keep their independence.

No part of the billions from federal taxpayers that go annually to our competitors comes to us.  In the past, our families were even prevented from taking the limited tax deductions available for college tuition.  We face the annual challenge of keeping up with the rapid growth of subsidies to higher education.

Today we watch with trepidation an attempt to establish federal control over all colleges and universities, including our campus.  Secretary of Education Margaret Spellings wants to extend the testing and standards requirements of the No Child Left Behind Act to colleges.  The specific details of what these testing an standards would entail are unclear, but are likely to be determined by education department regulators over the next several months.

President Bush and Ms. Spellings have brought a new approach to education reform at the federal level.  They have good motives and a fair appraisal of the situation, at least in K-12 education.  But national standards and testing in higher education will only strengthen a bureaucracy that already plagues an otherwise highly competitive system.

Mr. Bush and Ms. Spellings will not be around long enough to write the rules of this new program.  They will leave behind them a much larger department, now armed with the tools to influence education to a much greater extent.  Ms. Spellings often uses the language of Lyndon Johnson’s Great Society in her speeches.  Since Sept. 11, 2001, spending on higher education has grown at rates greater than, say, the Defense Department.

National standards are unnecessary in higher education.  There are already plenty of accountability tools available to students and their parents – starting with the ability to pick up and go elsewhere.  There are more than 2,000 accredited four-year colleges in the country.  At Hillsdale we have long survived by attracting private capital and good students to our campus, so we are well aware that universities compete for students, donations and top-notch professors every year.  We also know that those institutions that allow their standards to slip will soon find their best students and faculty members migrating elsewhere.

These facts notwithstanding, Ms. Spelling’s efforts to impose nationalized college testing began in earnest last fall when her National Commission on the Future of Higher Education issued its final report and recommended the new testing mandate.  Republicans – had they maintained control of Congress – might have gone along.  Instead Ms. Spellings is now attempting to impose the mandate through the backdoor by forcing college accreditation agencies to start demanding that the tests be imposed.

The accrediting agencies are now almost 100 years old, and colleges use them to learn about themselves and to demonstrate competence by third-part testimony.  The accrediting agencies have for the most part respected the mission and purpose of the institutions they review.  But since the federal government became a major funder of colleges, the accrediting agencies are the gateway to that money.  This makes them, as much as the recipient colleges, creates of federal policy.

Several weeks of tense “negotiated rule-making” between the department and the accrediting agencies have just ended without agreement.  The department has invited a representative of the largest accrediting agency to step down from the consulting panel because of her recalcitrance.  Meanwhile the department threatens to impose common standards in accrediting without agreement from the accreditors.  This is the opposite of competition and diversity.

Reform is certainly needed in higher education.  But we should be discussing tax credits not uniform standards.  We should be thinking about tax-free saving accounts for college rather than rules and subsidies.

Here in south central Michigan, we are used to being recalcitrant.  Living by private resources for more than a century and a half, we have supported the principles of “civil and religious liberty and intelligent piety” that have been the core of our public mission since the founding day.  We succeed today by the requirement of a tough core curriculum, recruitment of a talented student body committed to an honor code, and by remembering the relationship between liberal education and a free society.

Mr. Arnn is the president of Hillsdale College.

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TV’s and such

It seems to be one of those weeks where there isn’t necessarily a whole lot to tell.  So to make an entry, and anything with a little length, I will offer a smattering of thoughts from all over the spectrum.
A big Happy Birthday to Chris Horsley and Amanda Smith on the 14th.  I sent them both e-mails and wished them the best.  It is my Aunt Jackie’s birthday on the 25th, so Happy Birthday ahead of time.
Tuesday night Amanda and I went to pay a visit to Doris Coley.  She lives over in Laurel Fork area.  Amanda has worked with her for some time at Macy’s.  She lured Amanda over there in pursuit of a free TV and DVD player.  I really don’t care if we own either and would actually prefer not to.  That is just a little more weight I will have to worry about moving in a year and another distraction to take away some of what little time we mortals have been given.  Somehow I had come to believe it was a venture where we would go over and pick up the newly acquired property and head back home.  We made an evening of it.  We chatted about the nice lovely pleasantries of the life at Macy’s.  Conversation turned to life in general and school.  Of course I did a full analysis to see if her Coley line could in any way be related to mine (Hers is several hundreds of years in North Carolina making at least that long of a connection seeing how mine came directly from England).
She had a nice little piano in her living room that also became conversation.  She invited me to play it and before long I was in my own land while the women pondered paths I didn’t care to walk.  Before the night had ended we sang some hymns and even ended in a discussion about religion.  I ended the evening with giving her a copy of the Book of Mormon and basically a first discussion.  Sometimes I feel I am not as bold as I once was.  Honestly, it seems that one relies upon their companion so much to bear testimony and Amanda had no clue of the missionary ways that I think that is the only reason it felt pretty weak.  Sadly, I think both of us relied on trying to convince too much rather than just bearing testimony and letting the Spirit drive it to the heart.  Amanda left thinking we had been too bold and I left thinking we had not been bold enough.  She called us a few days later and made sure we were still planning on coming back.  Either way, we don’t seem to have offended.  I look forward to a return visit and whether or not she read any of the newly introduced sacred scripture.
Tonight I paid a visit to the Family History Library outside my normal working hours.  We had a pretty severe thunderstorm this evening and the two ladies working inside decided to go watch the storm for a minute.  Sadly, they left their keys in the library.  I rushed down thinking I would find two drowned older ladies.  Luckily enough they had only locked themselves out of the library, and not the building.  So I spent some time visiting with them about the Merrick’s of Maine/Massachusetts.  They decided to leave early so I played the piano and practiced some singing until a member of the Stake Presidency appeared to practice basketball.
Tuesday night at the library also proved to be interesting.  For the second week in a row a young man who is a recent convert came into the library to do some research.  He appeared with his laptop last week with PAF newly downloaded.  He started putting in his family.  He is preparing to go to the temple and wanted to do some of his own names for baptisms in about two weeks.  He never even knew who his Dad was last week.  This week he came back with dates and places and interestingly, was able to link him into the Cosby line.  Once we did that we were able to take him back to Jamestowne and even followed the line back 1,000 years.  He comes from a noble line in England.  He was amazed to find ancestors on both of his lines whose temple work had been done.  Some as early as 1932 in the Mesa, Arizona Temple.  I look forward to seeing him this coming Tuesday when we run these names through TempleReady.
Last Sunday we had our Stake Priesthood Meeting.  We were introduced to the new Mission President, President Millburn.  I prefer him much more than the last one.  He seems much more humble and able to connect with an audience.  In addition, he gave a great talk on fishing.  He is an expert at it, that is for sure.  Who else uses a stomach pump on a fish?  President Mullins (who interrupted my singing and playing tonight) gave a talk about various topics.  One was that individuals in the stake are not carrying their weight in fast offerings.  I thought that was interesting.  None of the other talks I remember.  However, the power in the singing was easily felt.
Today I was branded again at work due to a broker’s dishonesty.  A man gave me a complete sob story about why an appraisal was sufficient.  He manipulated my inexperience in working someone else’s loan, added with the other person not recording what they had done, and my not being thorough enough to catch the little red flags has now cost the bank a loan which is considered a risk and investors will not buy it.  Due to my approving of an updated appraisal, that wasn’t really updated, and the bank always standing by their word somebody got away with money that probably would not have been approved.  Like speeding tickets with points, I have now gained my first and hope they will wear off over time…  It is a good thing I no longer have access to that broker’s information for I would surely give him a phone call and let him know how sorely disappointed I am in him.  At any rate, “Let God choose between me and thee and reward thee according to thy deeds.”
Terry McComb’s funeral is going to be this coming Saturday.  I so wish I could be there.  Alas, we can’t do everything we want in life.  His obituary appeared today in the Times News.  I looked at it this morning at work.  I am looking forward to having my own clipping from the newspaper for my records.  I guess I will just have to pay a visit to the cemetery next time I get back to Idaho.  I so planned on spending a day or two in Branson on the way home for a lesson or two.  I guess I won’t now, at least stay for lessons.
We are headed up to Washington, DC again this weekend to attend the temple.  I am very much looking forward to it.  I have very much felt my faith increase this week and my soul feeling greatly nourished after some experiences in the scriptures.  2 Peter 2 and Ether 12 were powerful this week.
We received the Church News today and I read the parts about the new Brazil Temple.  I was thinking how excited President Faust must be to have the temple dedication coming up and realized he had passed away.  I guess he will be there at any rate, but not with a mortal body.  I wonder who will be called next.  I surely hope it is someone independent from the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles.  I certainly think tradition and order are a good thing but it is always nice to shake things up from time to time.  Too often people get so rigid about the way things should be done we forget the role of inspiration being mixed in the bag.  I would really like to see a President of the Church not be the most senior Apostle.  How would that be for shaking things up?  We need more John Winder’s, Reuben Clark’s, Jedediah Grant’s, Hyrum Smith’s, and Charles Nibley’s in the world.
Lastly, I will end on a political note.  I haven’t had a political candidate really catch much of the sympathies of my heart.  They seem so canned and stale I can’t stand it.  However, Obama gave a comment this week about opening up government.  Boy, if reading an article ever stopped my heart, that was one of them.  A candidate willing to give full disclosure to the public?  If that becomes his whole purpose in life, I will most certainly vote for that man.  Well, that is only after he drops universal health care.  After my experiences in England,  will never support government ran health care.  But open disclosure?  How refreshing.  That requires more effort.  That requires doing things you know the whole country can be privy to.  Where would Bill Clinton be if he had known that?  How would things be different with Bush?  Either of them?  Watergate?  Iran-Contra?  New Deal?  War?  How would the world be different?
by

Farewell to Terry

 

Yesterday early afternoon I received a phone call to notify me of the death of a dear friend.  There is always an interesting surge of emotions with the death of a person, especially one you feel such a kinship with.  Somehow though, I couldn’t help but feel a total sense of relief and release.

Terry McCombs was born in Rupert, Idaho and grew up on the farm outside of Rupert.  He graduated from Minico in probably its most notable time.  He went to school when Minico was known nationally for its band program.  The high school was still under 10 years old and Southern Idaho was in the Post-war boom.  Some of his mentors both in choir and band were to forever influence his life.  There was something about the farm soil and the passion of music that set Terry on his future.

I met Terry for the first time in 1997.  I had been asked to accompany a friend, Elena McBride, on the piano for a vocal number she was doing.  She wanted me to meet her vocal coach, Terry McCombs.  There was a McComb’s in my grade who I knew and one just younger who was in choir and who I knew more through friends.  These both turned out to be Terry’s niece’s.  Our meeting took place in Terry’s childhood home where his mother still lived with Terry’s brother’s family.  We sat there at the piano and I played perhaps a few chords when Terry asked me if I sang.  I confessed that I had no singing talent whatsoever and had never really tried.  He took over at the piano bench and then began to have me try a few exercises.  He attempted for hours to get beyond my modesty (my attempt to cover a poor voice).  After several hours, Elena’s lesson turned into an reworking of my thinking concerning singing.  For the most part of which he was very successful at rewiring.  Afterward I remember Elena being upset that her lesson was all about a lesson for me.

Terry had me commit to come to a lesson with him in a studio apartment he was using within about a mile from his home.  It was a little bedroom in the loft and a little living room below with a couch and piano.  I seem to remember a small kitchen and bathroom in the entry level.  We descended into the little living room about a week later and he sat on the couch and I sat in the chair.  Terry always had it a bit on the cool side but it definitely was cozy.  He then spent about an hour teaching me the doctrine of singing.  I remember him offering a prayer that seemed to turn my heart to complete mush.  I was so overwhelmed at such a powerful experience.  Coming from an inactive LDS home, I had no real clue what it was I was experiencing.  I had prayed before, and even seen prayers answered, but never had I experienced what I did that day.  Heaven literally descended and engulfed us that day.

After teaching me on the doctrines of the restoration of all things and of singing he then went on to teach me what he knew and how he knew it.  He bore powerful testimony of what it was he was teaching that day.  I remember openly weeping for the joy that engulfed my heart and how I recognized my life changing before my very eyes.  My very nature was changing in that room.  We then went to the piano and he began to unravel to me some of my physical nature.  I admit I understood more the nature of my throat, singing, and of life then than at any point in my life, probably even since.  It was interesting how he always framed everything with a view for eternity and the building of Zion.

What came from my mouth, from my very heart, was so beautiful we both wept.  Terry sang a song for me that even today haunts me with how beautiful it was.  He then sang a song from Rigoletto that was simply amazing.  He sat at the piano and I sang a song that day which I have not been able to sing since.  It haunts me how beautifully I sang and it kills me I have not been able to sing like that since.  There was such an outpouring of the Spirit.  I do not know if I can ever share what happened that day.  The gifts of the Spirit were present and angels ministered to us.

We met many, many times again in that little elevator to the heavens.  Sadly, I don’t know what happened after a couple of months.  Whether it was my pride or influences in his life, but it began to falter.  We started meeting again in his parents house and doing lessons there which were interrupted and never of much value.  We then started meeting in his home, the old out garage converted into a studio/living room connected to a trailer.  It was never quite the same.  I really don’t know why to this day.

My Senior year at Minico brought the musical Seven Brides for Seven Brothers.  I don’t remember how many lessons before the play I had with Terry but I had such a zeal with singing now I auditioned for the play.  I had been singing in the choir now for a little while.  I totally bombed the audition but somehow I was still put in as one of the brother’s.  Honestly, I did so poorly I didn’t know if they would let me even be a dancer.  That is how badly I auditioned vocally.  I could never translate how I could sing in lessons to doing it in front of other people.  I was terrible when anyone else listened.  Even the State Solo Competition I sang for and did so poorly I didn’t even finish the song.  The choir helped me some.  Good thing it was an open class.

Terry helped a number of us quite a bit with our singing for that play.  I improved considerably under Terry but never could find the voice I had in our lessons on stage.  It drove me completely crazy to know how heavenly it could be and it just never translated outside the studio.  Our lessons continued and I learned a great deal.  We continued to cover the history of music and the mechanics of the voice.  All of which I still feel like I have a pretty good handle since I was learning them from a spiritual perspective.

Minico ended and my whole life had now become engulfed in music.  I had my musical training from band all the way from 6th grade.  I could read and understood basics of music.  I had taught myself a half dozen new instruments in high school and I wrapped up high school putting on finishing touches to play the piano in the mission and learning the master the voice.

I went to Utah State knowing how much I loved music but I would not be pursuing a degree in anything related to it.  It was completely my hobby.  I went home at least every couple of weeks.  Due to situations at home I would either stay with my Grandma or I would stay with Terry.  We often spent all Friday night in a lesson.  It was something about the two of us that somehow we connected and heaven was with us.  I don’t know if he had these experiences with others.  I know he had in the past but I sensed it wasn’t happening with others at the time.  He often expressed his frustration with me at how he wished others wanted to learn just for the sake of learning rather than trying to do it for publicity, pride, or money.  He knew I had nothing to pay him and I wasn’t about to ask my parents for more money since they were helping me through school.  I think that is one thing that changed later.  When his situation got a bit more desperate and he needed money I had nothing to offer and he was required to spend his time teaching paying students.

The time came for the mission and I was prepared.  My own research and experience on my own time had gained me many experiences with the Spirit.  I had come to gain a personal testimony of the Bible, Book of Mormon, Prophets and Apostles, Priesthood, and a bunch more.  I think one thing that was unique is that Terry had opened me up to a very different side of religion.  It wasn’t just the knowledge of it or doctrines, but it was the personal experiences with it.  Through college our lessons moved from the vocal aspects to mostly discussing religion and sharing experiences.  I had obtained many new experiences with heaven and Terry had a wealth of them to share as well.  I think many thought I was a bit crazy with how literally I was experiencing my associations with the other side of the veil but Terry always understood.  I remember my Grandma would get so excited when I told her about some of the experiences.  She would tell me of some of her own.  Mom I instantly recognized was out to kill or denounce anything of which I was experiencing.  She quickly would tell me how it was a cult and I was being brainwashed.  When I would confront her about how literally some of my experiences were she would chalk it up to hallucinating or something else.  Terry and Grandma were two who understood.

It was such an interesting road.  My roommates at college I don’t think knew how to take what was happening.  Some were very understanding at the beginning, others finally warmed to it.  By the end of the school year at Utah State we had all experienced some things together.  The turmoil and emotions of the year were difficult with my parents divorcing and the changing face in so many relations.  The roommates weathered all those and were very understanding.  But the thing I remember most is the little spiritual times I had with each of them and interestingly have bonded each of us together since.  All four of them we continue to feel very closely united even despite distance and time.

Terry offered to have someone provide the musical number for the mission farewell.  He did and I was very grateful.  Surprisingly, he offered some money to help pay for the mission that makes me blush that he would give it to me.  He never wrote a letter, I don’t think I ever wrote him a letter during those two years, but we had communication.  I remember one night I had a dream of a phone call to Terry while I served in Eccles.  It was after my Grandmother had passed away.  We chatted about a few things and I told him of my experiences with Grandma after she passed away.  He told me of some of the experiences he had with his own father after he passed away.  It helped confirm what I was experiencing.  In the dream he told me to get a copy of Parley P Pratt’s Autobiography and to read it.  After I returned home from the mission and had been home a few weeks, Terry called me.  What I had totally passed off as a powerfully spiritual dream came very close to home when he asked if I enjoyed Brother Pratt’s book.  That is just the way Terry was.

Terry asked me to come to visit him in Branson, Missouri after I returned from the mission.  I went to visit him in a heartbeat.  Terry wanted to start lessons again and asked me to move to Branson.  I went back home and made arrangements and headed out for Missouri.  It turned out to be a wonderful experience.  I thoroughly loved my time while I was there.  He mentioned that I was there for two purposes: To learn to love in a way unselfishly and to gain some great experience to carry me throughout my life.  He proved to be very prophetic on both accounts.  I learned to love in several ways which hurt terribly.  I definitely learned some lessons there.  I learned some valuable lessons in management, the corporate world, missionary work outside the mission, and family history.

Terry and I both lived under the same roof with several other families the first year I was there.  It turned to be a very wonderful experience.  I had three families I could call my own in the same house.  Each of them taught me some very important lessons.  Without going into details, it proved to be a time I still find myself thankful for in prayer.

I remember one night I had a dream where I had a dream in answer to a prayer.  I woke up afterwards and immediately went to knock on Terry’s door.  At 3:00 AM in the morning I recounted to him my experience and we both wept for joy.  He shared with me an experience where one of his prayers had been answered by dream just nights before.  This was the type of connection I had with Terry.

Interestingly, it is how merciful heaven is in dealing with us.  Terry definitely had a personality.  Some characteristics I will openly admit drove me crazy.  His little antics sometimes were detestable at how he treated others.  Even me a couple of times.  At other times I could not help but feel sorry for him with the struggles he had on so many fronts.  He had a temper.  He had his bias nature.  He had all his imperfections.  He was not a physically beautiful man by any real means.  However, his heart was something different.  I sat in on many lessons and it was interesting how completely different some of them were.  Some of them it seemed he was trying to impress them so he could gain their trust.  Some it seemed he had to debase himself to get the heart.  Others it appeared he had to bully them.  Every lesson was very different.  I never understood if he was catering to the personality of each or what it was.  My lessons were very direct, even almost unspoken at times.  It was not uncommon for a look to communicate everything.

When it came time for my leaving Branson, we both knew.  I only saw Terry a couple of times after that.  In fact, I think it was only twice after.  Once was in Utah and the last time was a year ago as Amanda and I drove on our way to Virginia.  We stopped and spent several hours with him.

I spoke with him on the phone for over an hour just a month or so ago and he was in good spirits.  It was with a bit of shock I received the phone call telling me he had passed the night before.  Somehow though, it seems like it would be the way Terry would do it though.  My first reaction was that little scoundrel did this on purpose.  But then I sensed a peace about the whole thing and it was meant to be.

In looking back, Terry always introduced me to people as the one with a pure soul.  I don’t know if it is true or not, but I always wanted to be a little better with that title.  Terry always had people who either loved or hated him.  People somehow switched those sides often with him.  I never understood why.  But something about the man endeared people and also brought on some of the strongest criticism.  But in the end he usually weathered it well.

I haven’t had any experiences with Terry spiritually for a couple of years now.  Perhaps we just grew apart.  But now that he has passed, I anticipate something small, at least for a temporary good bye.  If not, this is my little pushing off the ship of a good friend.  I will see you later mate.  I love your soul.